This is a complaint I often hear from clients and others who are inspired to act on something new, but unable to do so because they don't have the authority to proceed. In my reliability consulting I often run into engineers and others who are responsible for results - improve plant reliability, but they have little to no spending authority. Sure they have some, but it's often well below the level they need to truly accomplish what they are there for. So where's the enemy in this scenario?
Yes, the boss has a higher level of spending (signing) authority, but often that's not high enough, the rules push us further up the corporate food chain. Look at government procurement as an extreme example. Government employees can spend money on goods and services up to preset and usually quite low spending limits. Beyond that they must go through a complex bidding process to get anything done. The process is intended to be fair, but often times it only "appears" fair. Bid processes are often "rigged" in very subtle ways to direct the result where the originator of the request wants it to go anyway. The real victim is the government's "customer" (that's us the tax payers) who have to wait longer and spend more to get something that was clearly needed all along. The rules have truly created harm in this case. So where's the enemy? It's not the rules!
The rules reflect people's fears. Those fears are based in a fear of someone else's reaction to your actions. Look again a government procurement rules. There are multiple levels of fear at play. The superficial fear is that a government employee will abuse his / her spending priviledges and "cheat" the taxpayers. Most people are truly honest - very few are cheaters or we'd have a lot more in jails. The rules don't really keep honest people honest - guidelines that make sense to the honest person (not overly constraining rules) would do that just as well. So that fear is not well founded. The next layer of fear is that the spending would go to "favourites" of the person doing the spending. And all government spending must provide equal opportunity to all who might want to bid.
But, if the person originating the request has done their homework - as they usually have, they already know who "should" win the bid and often create a statement of work or some other qualification requirement that will end up in the bidding documents that almost certainly ensures that person will win. This process creates a lot of work for the originator, those who manage the bidding process (remember they are at arms length from everyone) and the bidders (most of whom didn't stand a real chance in the first instance). This wastes a lot of peoples' time and money and drives up the cost of the job - just to fund the procurement process. Again, is this really what we the taxpayers want? It only truly serves a few special interest groups who want to bid but feel mistreated because they seldom win anyway. If they were truly aware of what's going on they'd shift their tactics and learn from their unsuccessful bids. Why should we taxpayers waste our money for that? Fear of appearing to be unfair to only a few poor (bid) losers is driving a whole lot of cost, inefficiency and holding people back. The government employee who had to start this process was originally responding to a legitimate need after all - and it must wait for all this to happen. We are not being well served by these rigid rules.
And that occurs in business too - it is by no means limited to government. Sometimes the goal is as simple as finding the lowest cost supplier. I've seen companies spend thousands of dollars on procurement processes that save them only hundreds. And then they wonder why they have a consultant (yes, someone like me) around to show them that!
There are many examples to share of rules being put aside, and admonishments for not putting them aside too.
1. I was an engineer with a petro-chemical company earlier in my career. I found a problem with some machinery that required an expensive part to be made and transported from Houston, TX to our plant (about 1,000 miles). The cost of all that was well above my spending authority, that of my boss and that of the purchaser. We needed the plant managers signature. Getting that caused a delay of several hours - each of those hours cost us over $100,000 in downtime (lost opportunity cost). When I finally got his signature he admonished me for waiting. Why didn't I just make up a PO #, go around the system, get what we needed and save us all that money? Lesson learned.
2. When the Royal Navy had to mobilize for war in the Falklands (1982) they had to mount a complex and large campaign a long way from home - something the RN hadn't done for over a century. They literally tossed the rule books aside to allow very junior officers and non-commissioned officers enough authority to get what they needed done in a timely manner - time was of the essence (as lawyers like to say).
In both of those cases the goals were clear and we (the people with responsibility but no authority) knew what had to be done. There was no good reason to hold us back. The goal - that objective that was very clear, was all that was needed. The rules didn't fit the circumstances. And they seldom do.
The enemy is the misbelief in some sort of reprisal from some third party (who probably doesn't even know what's going on). The rules are there to protect that uninformed person's interests and to prevent abuse by otherwise well-intentioned employees. Is that really smart? Recognize the enemy here - it's not the rules, it's not even the fear, it's what we are fearing. Look beneath the obvious to find your enemies and then ask if you really need to fear them.
11 February 2008
10 February 2008
Are you surrounded by enemies?
Do you ever feel like you've got nothing but enemies around you? Like you can trust no one? Do you treat others with suspicion? Do you always count your change and then attack the other person if they've made an error? Do you feel like they are trying to cheat you?
These feelings, and many others, are signs that you are creating a combative, enemy-rich environment around you. We all create our own environments, our surroundings, the context within which we operate.
Have you ever wondered if anyone tryied to cheat Mother Theresa or anyone else who is very giving of themselves? It's tough to imagine isn't it. Why? Someone who is always helping others, giving of themselves is not someone who you have to cheat. They have created an environment around themselves where no one would want to cheat them.
Have you ever had a boss at work who was truly supportive and nurturing? Someone who really wanted you to succeed? Notice how that person is held in high regard - not just by you, but by many others. I have had many bosses like that - they truly wanted me to succeed and helped me to do so. When one of them, John, died a few years ago I cried - as did many of my colleauges who also worked closely with him. We all felt as if we had lost a kind and loving influence in our lives - and we had. John had very few if any enemies. Even his competitors felt a loss. He had created that environment by simply being himself. He wasn't distrustful. He didn't create enemies.
There are many stories of how people create their own enemies and others create allies. Dale Carnegie's books have many such examples. Treat people harshly and you'll find it comes back to you. Treat them with respect, truly appreciate them, and you'll be respected and appreciated. Others want to do things for those who make them feel good about themselves. If you distrust someone or create that enemy relationship in some other way, you'll create that environment and be treated accordingly.
I used to have some distrust of a fellow named Rene. He was a "consultant" of sorts to me - a coach / mentor / teacher. When he'd suggest that I needed a bit more help I'd feel that he really wanted more billable hours - at my expense. I was learning a lot so I put up with it. I'd complain about it to myself, but I also looked inside myself. Would I do that to a client? No, I wouldn't - I never have, but I would think about it. Other fears would always hold me back. So why would I fear this from Rene? I realized that since I wouldn't do it, then neither would he, but a part of me thought about doing it and had to be explored. He would trigger all sorts of feelings about myself by allowing me to feel something bad about him. It was part of the way he taught me. I only had to feel it, go inside and challenge my feelings about myself - dig into why I felt that way and then make a choice. When I realized that, I began to trust him much more fully. I realized he was truly helping me and that I was indeed getting good value for the money I was paying to him. I have learned, and continue to learn a lot about myself by observing these feelings.
When I argue with my wife Aileen, I ask myself why? What is being triggered? What feelings do I have about her that are reflecting something inside me? In the moment I don't always see this - so we argue. Later I reflect on it and dig deeply into myself. I have always discovered something about me that needed to be uncovered. Once that's revealed to me, out in the open, I can deal with it and make a choice. Do I want to continue that way, or change? Usually I choose change.
Look into your feelings about those around you and then turn them around on yourself. By observing your feelings about others you are revealing your feelings about aspects of yourself. Ask yourself, what is it about me that I don't trust? that I don't respect? that I don't appreciate? that I don't love? Dig and you'll find answers. By doing this you get to know yourself better. By doing that, you can choose to either stay the same or to change how you feel about yourself. Reframe those feelings about yourself. You'll find that it is reflected in how you deal with others. And you'll make fewer enemies. By changing, the enemies you already have will even see a new you. They'll wonder what happened to you. And they'll become friends - people who want to help you.
These feelings, and many others, are signs that you are creating a combative, enemy-rich environment around you. We all create our own environments, our surroundings, the context within which we operate.
Have you ever wondered if anyone tryied to cheat Mother Theresa or anyone else who is very giving of themselves? It's tough to imagine isn't it. Why? Someone who is always helping others, giving of themselves is not someone who you have to cheat. They have created an environment around themselves where no one would want to cheat them.
Have you ever had a boss at work who was truly supportive and nurturing? Someone who really wanted you to succeed? Notice how that person is held in high regard - not just by you, but by many others. I have had many bosses like that - they truly wanted me to succeed and helped me to do so. When one of them, John, died a few years ago I cried - as did many of my colleauges who also worked closely with him. We all felt as if we had lost a kind and loving influence in our lives - and we had. John had very few if any enemies. Even his competitors felt a loss. He had created that environment by simply being himself. He wasn't distrustful. He didn't create enemies.
There are many stories of how people create their own enemies and others create allies. Dale Carnegie's books have many such examples. Treat people harshly and you'll find it comes back to you. Treat them with respect, truly appreciate them, and you'll be respected and appreciated. Others want to do things for those who make them feel good about themselves. If you distrust someone or create that enemy relationship in some other way, you'll create that environment and be treated accordingly.
I used to have some distrust of a fellow named Rene. He was a "consultant" of sorts to me - a coach / mentor / teacher. When he'd suggest that I needed a bit more help I'd feel that he really wanted more billable hours - at my expense. I was learning a lot so I put up with it. I'd complain about it to myself, but I also looked inside myself. Would I do that to a client? No, I wouldn't - I never have, but I would think about it. Other fears would always hold me back. So why would I fear this from Rene? I realized that since I wouldn't do it, then neither would he, but a part of me thought about doing it and had to be explored. He would trigger all sorts of feelings about myself by allowing me to feel something bad about him. It was part of the way he taught me. I only had to feel it, go inside and challenge my feelings about myself - dig into why I felt that way and then make a choice. When I realized that, I began to trust him much more fully. I realized he was truly helping me and that I was indeed getting good value for the money I was paying to him. I have learned, and continue to learn a lot about myself by observing these feelings.
When I argue with my wife Aileen, I ask myself why? What is being triggered? What feelings do I have about her that are reflecting something inside me? In the moment I don't always see this - so we argue. Later I reflect on it and dig deeply into myself. I have always discovered something about me that needed to be uncovered. Once that's revealed to me, out in the open, I can deal with it and make a choice. Do I want to continue that way, or change? Usually I choose change.
Look into your feelings about those around you and then turn them around on yourself. By observing your feelings about others you are revealing your feelings about aspects of yourself. Ask yourself, what is it about me that I don't trust? that I don't respect? that I don't appreciate? that I don't love? Dig and you'll find answers. By doing this you get to know yourself better. By doing that, you can choose to either stay the same or to change how you feel about yourself. Reframe those feelings about yourself. You'll find that it is reflected in how you deal with others. And you'll make fewer enemies. By changing, the enemies you already have will even see a new you. They'll wonder what happened to you. And they'll become friends - people who want to help you.
Do we have enemies in our family?
Those of us old enough to remember "Leave it to Beaver" and the "Dick van Dyke Show" among others will recall how families used to be portrayed as being loving with very supportive environments. A newer show, "Seventh Heaven" does much the same thing, but it also shows how we get into trouble by not fully appreciating the help we can get from our families.
By not appreciating those closest to us we set them up, even in small ways, as enemies (at least in our own minds). We hide things from them. Why? Don't we trust them? Are we afraid that we'll somehow be judged and therefore "less than" if we open up? Complete openness and honesty are hallmarks of how we behave with our closest friends - our confidants. If you don't feel comfortable being that way with family, then you've created an enemy in your perceptions of those family members. Chances are that they will also feel the same about you. And neither of you will realize it fully. The more consciously aware you are of this, the more you can break down those barriers.
Open up and be honest. Let the other know how you feel and why you don't open up fully. Be the first to break down the barrier. You may be surprised at their response and how loving it can be. I did this just last night with my wife. I told her how I was feeling and what thoughts that was creating in my mind. By doing that, I allowed her into a part of me that I was shielding and keeping to myself. Her response? She opened right up to me in a way that she'd never done before. She shared similar thoughts that she was having. We were able to discuss it all openly and in a loving way - no fighting, no malice what-so-ever. It was amazingly loving and we both feel so much freer than we had. It helped us and it can help you too.
If you think of your family as someone to hide from, keep secrets from, then you'll be creating a sort of enemy. Someone you don't trust or can't be open with. You'll never be fully comfortable with them and if you can't be comfortable with them, how can you be comfortable with others?
Look inside. Examine what you want to hide and why. What are you afraid of if you let it out in a loving way? Chances are that whoever you hold back from, they are also holding back from you. Love is a two way street - putting up speed bumps and barriers blocks the flow. Take them down.
By not appreciating those closest to us we set them up, even in small ways, as enemies (at least in our own minds). We hide things from them. Why? Don't we trust them? Are we afraid that we'll somehow be judged and therefore "less than" if we open up? Complete openness and honesty are hallmarks of how we behave with our closest friends - our confidants. If you don't feel comfortable being that way with family, then you've created an enemy in your perceptions of those family members. Chances are that they will also feel the same about you. And neither of you will realize it fully. The more consciously aware you are of this, the more you can break down those barriers.
Open up and be honest. Let the other know how you feel and why you don't open up fully. Be the first to break down the barrier. You may be surprised at their response and how loving it can be. I did this just last night with my wife. I told her how I was feeling and what thoughts that was creating in my mind. By doing that, I allowed her into a part of me that I was shielding and keeping to myself. Her response? She opened right up to me in a way that she'd never done before. She shared similar thoughts that she was having. We were able to discuss it all openly and in a loving way - no fighting, no malice what-so-ever. It was amazingly loving and we both feel so much freer than we had. It helped us and it can help you too.
If you think of your family as someone to hide from, keep secrets from, then you'll be creating a sort of enemy. Someone you don't trust or can't be open with. You'll never be fully comfortable with them and if you can't be comfortable with them, how can you be comfortable with others?
Look inside. Examine what you want to hide and why. What are you afraid of if you let it out in a loving way? Chances are that whoever you hold back from, they are also holding back from you. Love is a two way street - putting up speed bumps and barriers blocks the flow. Take them down.
09 February 2008
Business without enemies
In business we are always worried about some "threat". It could be competitive or it could be predatory. It could be the taxman, the customer who could dump you and switch business elsewhere, the employee who sabotages your business and so on.
All of those worries stem from fears. We are afraid of something bad happening to our business because of the actions of others. We blame "them," whoever they are, for our mis-fortunes. Indeed, others do have a hand to play in our success or failure, but so do we. I'll talk about our role in a future blog entry. Here it's about others.
If we don't see others as enemies and they too share that view, then what's to fear? A competitor is looking after his / her own interest, not trying to harm yours. In fact a competitor helps you by keeping you on top of your game or you'll loose business. If that happens, it's not because of the competitor, it's because of your response (or lack of it) to a competitive challenge.
If your suppliers and customers don't see you as an enemy, then they'll see you as a "partner" or a "friend". Look at how the world's greatest manufacturer deals with suppliers and customers for an example. Toyota has been doing this for a long time. And they are doing very well. This approach to business works well for them - why can't it work for you too?
Look at other businesses where suppliers are treated as expendable and potentially threatening if their prices are too high. Do business as a supplier to most companies and you'll see what I mean. The customer or client wants you to lower prices, to speed up delivery, to invoice slowly, to forgive late payments... They are not respecting your legitimate business needs and they truly don't appreciate you. Some of these customers are even not worth having at all.
If you don't see your business interactions as threatening, then why would you be defensive? Give it a thought - if you shifted your perspective perhaps you can influence those you deal with too. It works for me. Being open about it is a first step.
All of those worries stem from fears. We are afraid of something bad happening to our business because of the actions of others. We blame "them," whoever they are, for our mis-fortunes. Indeed, others do have a hand to play in our success or failure, but so do we. I'll talk about our role in a future blog entry. Here it's about others.
If we don't see others as enemies and they too share that view, then what's to fear? A competitor is looking after his / her own interest, not trying to harm yours. In fact a competitor helps you by keeping you on top of your game or you'll loose business. If that happens, it's not because of the competitor, it's because of your response (or lack of it) to a competitive challenge.
If your suppliers and customers don't see you as an enemy, then they'll see you as a "partner" or a "friend". Look at how the world's greatest manufacturer deals with suppliers and customers for an example. Toyota has been doing this for a long time. And they are doing very well. This approach to business works well for them - why can't it work for you too?
Look at other businesses where suppliers are treated as expendable and potentially threatening if their prices are too high. Do business as a supplier to most companies and you'll see what I mean. The customer or client wants you to lower prices, to speed up delivery, to invoice slowly, to forgive late payments... They are not respecting your legitimate business needs and they truly don't appreciate you. Some of these customers are even not worth having at all.
If you don't see your business interactions as threatening, then why would you be defensive? Give it a thought - if you shifted your perspective perhaps you can influence those you deal with too. It works for me. Being open about it is a first step.
What is a "world without enemies"
Imagine a world where no one will intentionally do harm to you. This world would be free of many evils we know today.
We need to shift our consciousness to make this happen. Realize that whenever you hurm someone, harm another, do harm to property or the environment, we all suffer - including you. There are consequences for every action - including doing harm of any sort.
Hurt someone - they may hurt you back.
Harm the environment - you live with the pollution too.
Hurt yourself - you even hurt those close to you.
Some religions suggest we forgive. Turn the other cheek. Why not? If you don't hurt someone back, then the cycle of harm stops. When you are angry - tell the other person, but don't abuse them with angry words or actions. Let them know how you feel and then work with them to resolve it. And be willing to work with others to resolve problems that they bring to your attention.
Do this in your personal life. It can pay huge dividends. I already do it - sometimes it's challenging to break loose of my old ways. But it is worth the effort. Try it.
- There would be no need for war.
- There would be no need for "adversarial" processes such as those common in the legal systems of many countries.
- There would be no need to arm yourself as defense against predatory individuals or nations.
- There would be no need to fear competition - the competitors are not enemies, their presence helps you improve.
We need to shift our consciousness to make this happen. Realize that whenever you hurm someone, harm another, do harm to property or the environment, we all suffer - including you. There are consequences for every action - including doing harm of any sort.
Hurt someone - they may hurt you back.
Harm the environment - you live with the pollution too.
Hurt yourself - you even hurt those close to you.
Some religions suggest we forgive. Turn the other cheek. Why not? If you don't hurt someone back, then the cycle of harm stops. When you are angry - tell the other person, but don't abuse them with angry words or actions. Let them know how you feel and then work with them to resolve it. And be willing to work with others to resolve problems that they bring to your attention.
Do this in your personal life. It can pay huge dividends. I already do it - sometimes it's challenging to break loose of my old ways. But it is worth the effort. Try it.
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