George Orwell's book "1984" foretells about all-knowing, all seeing totalitarian government exerting total control over its people. The terms, "big brother" and "Orwellian" were inspired by this work. Perhaps the date was wrong - perhaps it should have been 2008. And who's our greatest enemy in this mess but ourselves! We chose this.
We have allowed ourselves to be thankful to for allowing it in. Governments, and particularly the US government under George W Bush, have taken us on a giant step closer to totalitarian rule. As the largest economy on earth the US exerts enormous influence and they know it. Around the world the financial industry has followed the "wild west" approach of the US financial industry. Assets didn't matter - money made money. And now it has fallen down like a house of cards.
Bush has been behaving like some sort of reincarnation of Hitler, but much craftier if indeed the ideas are his. Brutality isn't needed this time - at least not on home turf (but look where he uses it elsewhere). Where financial turmoil won't work, brutality and aggression is a good proxy. A good old fashioned financial crisis (like those globally in the 1930's) really stirs up fear and leads to fear based choices in our developed world. Make no mistake about it, our current financial markets crisis was manufactured and fueled by our fears. And I doubt that it is mere coincidence that it happens at a time when large parts of the developing world are embroiled in military or other violent crises.
This situation we are in was manufactured by those who stand to gain the most - our governments. And if you think they are "democratic" - then think again. Once elected, our governments tend to act for their own best interests. Here in Canada for instance, we "elect our dictators". The election that takes place today (14 Oct 0 is all about an egotistical and controlling minority leader (Stephen Harper) who wants a majority so he can control even more. This is clearly his election.
The US election is a bit different because the incumbent (Bush) can't run, but what are his successors looking for? We may be fortunate enough to see his successor in the Republican party go down to defeat. The hope of that gives me some reason to feel that the political system can work - at least a bit, but for how long? Never-the-less, the winner in the US will be faced with enormous challenges, perhaps even perceived as unsolvable without government intervention. A right leaning government (Republican) would just grab control as that's what they do - for big money interests. A more liberal (Democratic) government will feel compelled to control in the best interests of those who need help the most. Two objectives, same trigger, same result. It may not matter who wins. Government gets more control.
The "rules" of the financial games allowed a great deal of very complex risk taking and gamesmanship to occur. The financial industry got caught up in its games while the rest of us watched from the sidelines, not really knowing what was going on. The complex house of cards that was created eventually collapsed because there was nothing of value underlying all the investing. The money was backed by no real assets.
But dig a bit deeper. The "rules" allowed us enough rope to hang ourselves. Collectively we got into trouble - the financial sector simply played the leading role in a well orchestrated game. Look at who makes the rules - the governments at various levels and their various agencies set up to "protect" us all. Of course most of them didn't have a clue what they were doing and they merely followed the rules as set by those who appeared to be doing the best at the game. In Canada we've followed the US lead. The financial leaders in the US, UK, France, Germany and a few other countries were masters at the games. Others followed suit through greed – fear of not doing as well as the other “leaders”. And over time, the various financial systems all became entrained in the same dangerous game to varying degrees. And then it collapses.
The US sub-prime mortgage situation was the last straw. With no real value underlying the investments the investments were abandoned. That began a chain reaction - like dominos. So now there's a mess to clean up. Who do we look to for a solution? Who do we demand help from? Who steps in with the bailouts? Of course it's the very governments that set this whole system up to fail in the first place. Brilliant! Governments are now investing in the banks and bailing out failed financial institutions. Of course a few were allowed to collapse as examples in order to really underscore the gravity of the situation. Those sacrifices demonstrated that the current system (all playing by the governments' rules) was inadequate. The case is made for more government action. They softened us up for a power grab.
Governments are now stepping in with the argument that the entire economy depends on the health of those financial institutions. They cannot be allowed to fail and more - there have already been too many. There is truth in that, but look how we got there. By carefully crafting the rules of the game the failure was manufactured. The solution puts greater control in the hands of the very governments that created the problem. And to make matters worse, they are doing it with our money - or rather, what's left of it.
I see this taking us down the path of creating more government. More of what got us into this mess in the first place. The wolves are in charge of the chicken coup and we’re the chickens! Orwell's prophecy may come true yet! Why are we allowing that to happen? Many of us would say we want less government, yet we allow more. Many others want more government. I argue that they have virtually abdicated their free will - they no longer choose for themselves, they let others do it for them. They are not even leaders in their own lives. Jack Welch (former CEO of GM) once said, "control your own destiny or someone else will" - by failing to choose for ourselves we allow that control over our destiny.
Collectively we are choosing more government. We are, through our actions and inaction, allowing our governments to grow at our own expense. And it's happening on a grand scale globally. The global scale suggests that global consciousness is very consistent – and it’s all acting out of fear. While individuals and even large groups may disagree with the direction the "fixes" are taking, they are far outnumbered by the majority who either don’t understand, don’t know it’s happening, don't care or worse, actually support what the governments are doing. Typically those supporters will be those who depend on government most heavily. Out of fear they won’t bite the hand that feeds them. They don’t take responsibility for their own choices. Taxes and social programs, while seemingly well meaning, promote this mediocrity in the masses of people in our society. What we earn isn't really our own any more – government can just grab what it wants – and we let it! And sadly, many don't even realize what’s going on. They are not consciously aware of just how little free will they are choosing to exercise. They don't allow it themselves.
And others advocate less government and less tax. Let the free market reign. That's just another extreme and we have seen recently that it doesn't necessarily work unless the rules make sense. But who makes the rules?
Historically the world's peoples have revolted against their governments when the governments went too far. These revolutions were led by those who truly saw the big picture of what was going on. The American Revolution is a great example of how this happens. It wasn't a political coup by some military or other popular leader - it was a genuine revolution by the people against a government that was exerting too much control over them. Is it time for another revolution - this time against our governments globally? Perhaps its time to up the ante.
Do we really want a big brother as Orwell so aptly described? The choice is ours - and in choosing as we have, we are presently our own worst enemies. Choose consciously.
14 October 2008
13 September 2008
Creating Criminals
Greetings,
As a member of Toastmasters International I meet some interesting and amazing people. One is a recent member of our local club named Paul. He's a former criminal who has completely turned his life around. He recently gave a terrific and touching speech that I believe is worth publishing here. He really gave me food for thought and I'm sure he'll give it to you. Please enjoy and then reflect:
"I was flipping through the channels a few weeks ago and I caught a quote, posted on the screen. It was from a viewer of the local news. This viewer had wrote in their opinion in response to a previous story. The story was on the most recent violence and shootings in Toronto. They wrote in saying “if our justice system and courts were not so lenient on our youth, then we wouldn't be having all these problems. We need tougher penalties and longer sentences to handle these people.” This statement took me back. Wow! our society is so naive. Look at where we place the blame. It is not the justice systems responsibility to fix these people. It is our responsibility as citizens, as people, as fellow human beings who walk this world together; to fix this issue. This person felt we needed to rule with the iron fist. Anyone who doesn't follow our rules or fit into our society must be locked up. Put them in jail and throw away the key.
We cannot fight hate with hate. For it was hate that created these criminals in the first place. In the absence of love, hate will prevail. Love is our goal. Love is our ambition. It is when we feel that this is being taken away from us, that is when we react and fight to get it back At any cost. We all crave this love, we all strive for this attention and warmth. Those “criminals”, they want the same things you and I do. They want to feel welcomed. They want to feel apart of something. They want the admiration and respect of their fellow man. Do we honestly believe that the gangs were the first place these people looked for acceptance? The gangs were just the place that someone finally welcomed them with open arms. As people they are no different from you or I. The only difference is society has put them on the outside and as outsiders all they have is the gun to enforce their rules. And each member of that family is more than happy to pick up a weapon to preserve their way of life. For it is that life that has finally given them the feelings they were looking for. The same feelings we all struggle for and long for within us. To me the gun symbolizes how hard these people are willing to fight to hold onto that feeling.
I want to take you on a journey. I want to take you back to kindergarten. Visualize a classroom full of young, spunky three and four year olds. How many of them have a gun? How many do you see living the “thug” life? How many, when asked say “when I grow up I want to be a criminal”? Not one person is born with the desire to hate, the wanting to destroy or the willingness to kill. But then our youth does grow up some do become criminals and some do kill. Why is that? If we are a society and the criminals are outsiders, how did they get there? The kindergarten kids are all insiders but when they grow to adolescents some become outsiders. What happened? At one point or another they get pushed away. We make them feel unwelcome and unwanted. We as adults modeled this behavior everyday as we interact with others and our kids, well they follow us perfectly. As a result we give these people only one final option. We turn them to the last family out there, the family of outsiders, in search of acceptance.
Do you believe that if you grew up under similar circumstances you would be any different from these people. From the way our society treats each other can you expect there to be any difference in the result. When we interact with the people around us we either leave them feeling good about themselves or we leave them feeling terrible about us. We either build love within each other or we foster hate and resentment. With every interaction we have a choice, we can either share a smile and say hi or we can ignore and continue to push away. You want a world filled with respect – show it. You want a world filled of love – give it. All of our issues on the outside stem from our personal issues on the inside. Pick up a book, read it. Learn its teachings. Educate yourself to become a better you so our children can have a better model.
It seems so convenient and easy, just like the lady on the news to blame others for the problems To say its their fault that life is this way. I'm here to tell you this. Take a look at your hand when you point the finger at someone. For every time you point the finger - there are three pointing right back at you. Thank you."
As a member of Toastmasters International I meet some interesting and amazing people. One is a recent member of our local club named Paul. He's a former criminal who has completely turned his life around. He recently gave a terrific and touching speech that I believe is worth publishing here. He really gave me food for thought and I'm sure he'll give it to you. Please enjoy and then reflect:
"I was flipping through the channels a few weeks ago and I caught a quote, posted on the screen. It was from a viewer of the local news. This viewer had wrote in their opinion in response to a previous story. The story was on the most recent violence and shootings in Toronto. They wrote in saying “if our justice system and courts were not so lenient on our youth, then we wouldn't be having all these problems. We need tougher penalties and longer sentences to handle these people.” This statement took me back. Wow! our society is so naive. Look at where we place the blame. It is not the justice systems responsibility to fix these people. It is our responsibility as citizens, as people, as fellow human beings who walk this world together; to fix this issue. This person felt we needed to rule with the iron fist. Anyone who doesn't follow our rules or fit into our society must be locked up. Put them in jail and throw away the key.
We cannot fight hate with hate. For it was hate that created these criminals in the first place. In the absence of love, hate will prevail. Love is our goal. Love is our ambition. It is when we feel that this is being taken away from us, that is when we react and fight to get it back At any cost. We all crave this love, we all strive for this attention and warmth. Those “criminals”, they want the same things you and I do. They want to feel welcomed. They want to feel apart of something. They want the admiration and respect of their fellow man. Do we honestly believe that the gangs were the first place these people looked for acceptance? The gangs were just the place that someone finally welcomed them with open arms. As people they are no different from you or I. The only difference is society has put them on the outside and as outsiders all they have is the gun to enforce their rules. And each member of that family is more than happy to pick up a weapon to preserve their way of life. For it is that life that has finally given them the feelings they were looking for. The same feelings we all struggle for and long for within us. To me the gun symbolizes how hard these people are willing to fight to hold onto that feeling.
I want to take you on a journey. I want to take you back to kindergarten. Visualize a classroom full of young, spunky three and four year olds. How many of them have a gun? How many do you see living the “thug” life? How many, when asked say “when I grow up I want to be a criminal”? Not one person is born with the desire to hate, the wanting to destroy or the willingness to kill. But then our youth does grow up some do become criminals and some do kill. Why is that? If we are a society and the criminals are outsiders, how did they get there? The kindergarten kids are all insiders but when they grow to adolescents some become outsiders. What happened? At one point or another they get pushed away. We make them feel unwelcome and unwanted. We as adults modeled this behavior everyday as we interact with others and our kids, well they follow us perfectly. As a result we give these people only one final option. We turn them to the last family out there, the family of outsiders, in search of acceptance.
Do you believe that if you grew up under similar circumstances you would be any different from these people. From the way our society treats each other can you expect there to be any difference in the result. When we interact with the people around us we either leave them feeling good about themselves or we leave them feeling terrible about us. We either build love within each other or we foster hate and resentment. With every interaction we have a choice, we can either share a smile and say hi or we can ignore and continue to push away. You want a world filled with respect – show it. You want a world filled of love – give it. All of our issues on the outside stem from our personal issues on the inside. Pick up a book, read it. Learn its teachings. Educate yourself to become a better you so our children can have a better model.
It seems so convenient and easy, just like the lady on the news to blame others for the problems To say its their fault that life is this way. I'm here to tell you this. Take a look at your hand when you point the finger at someone. For every time you point the finger - there are three pointing right back at you. Thank you."
04 September 2008
Let's just elect a psychopath again!
A good friend of mine sent me this link about Sarah Pallin's track record when it comes to animals. Yes, I'm no idiot - wolves and bears can be natural predators. That's what they are! Don't humans get it?
We're the ones encroaching on their habitat. Turning technology on animals is nothing short of barbaric. The National Rifle Association (to which Sarah also belongs) is probably delighted to have her on the Republican ticket. Heaven help planet earth if we get another "Bush - clone" team in the white house.
We didn't learn the first time; Bush was elected a second time - shame.
Let's not repeat the error. Earth is too important to all of us to leave it in the hands of incompetent and misguided American politicians.
Yes - for those of you who are American - I am a Canadian. I love America and my wife is American. But we are also human beings and we care deeply about our planet. It's time to stop cow-towing to the special interests of splinter groups and self-centered industries.
We're the ones encroaching on their habitat. Turning technology on animals is nothing short of barbaric. The National Rifle Association (to which Sarah also belongs) is probably delighted to have her on the Republican ticket. Heaven help planet earth if we get another "Bush - clone" team in the white house.
We didn't learn the first time; Bush was elected a second time - shame.
Let's not repeat the error. Earth is too important to all of us to leave it in the hands of incompetent and misguided American politicians.
Yes - for those of you who are American - I am a Canadian. I love America and my wife is American. But we are also human beings and we care deeply about our planet. It's time to stop cow-towing to the special interests of splinter groups and self-centered industries.
09 May 2008
Canada's Plunge into Mediocrity
Canada is a blessed nation in many respects. We are generally and open and welcoming society with abundant natural resources, intelligent and well-educated citizens, a healthy climate for business and so much more. Yet, the country is racing towards mediocrity in many ways.
In our attempts to be "politically correct" we are forgetting what it means to be Canadian. We are subordinating Canadian to the second part of a hyphenated association with a sub-culture within Canada. We dance around issues for fear of hurting someone's feelings rather than confronting issues and hammering them out to the greater interest of us all. Our government is leading that plunge.
We have failed to create any vision for Canada's future. Consequently our nation is aimlessly moving towards chaos at the federal, provincial and local levels.
At the moment there is a parliamentary act, Bill C-51 that proposes draconian controls and moves Canada another step closer to fascism. It attempts to put the natural products, vitamin, supplement, homeopathic industry at a disadvantage. It discourages Canadians from choosing and choosing health. It encourages us to follow the whims of the pharmaceutical industry and the medical profession. I realize that many believe they are doing good in both medical and pharma industries, but are they?
We have a "sick care" system, not a "health care" system regardless of what it is labelled officially. Doctors treat the sick. Hospitals are for the sick. Pharmaceuticals are to treat the sick and diseased. None of this promotes sustaining of a healthy state so that we don't get sick. There is no education in Canada beyond the most basic levels in grade school that is aimed at teaching us about maintaining our personal health. Essentially we are left with the knowledge that if we get sick we get taken care of. That's fine and we do enjoy that, but why not encourage us to avoid sickness?
Bill C-51 supports the pharmaceutical industry interests. I'm sure it's being paid for behind the scenes with payoffs to our Prime Minister (Stephen Harper) and Minister of Health (Tony Clement). Sure, those will be hidden in contributions or some in-kind donation to something or other. You won't see the money in their bank accounts. But it's no less real. C-51 puts roadblocks in the path of those of us who choose health, who choose to educate ourselves (because we care) and who choose to stay out of our expensive and overburdened "sick care" system. It's absurdity and it is driving Canada down yet another path to mediocrity.
If you are a Canadian reading this I urge you to write to your MP, to our Min of Health (Tony Clement) and our PM (Stephen Harper) to urge them to withdraw C-51 or at least to vote against it. Their address is: name, House of Commons, Ottawa, ON, K1A 0A6. No postage is required for letters to parliament so save your stamps. If you want to learn more please click on the link I've provided.
Choose free choice. Choose health. Choose a healthy and vigorous Canada free from the political interference of our industrial lobby groups. Choose parliamentarians who truly represent all of our best interests in common not the interests of small special interest groups to the exclusion of others.
In our attempts to be "politically correct" we are forgetting what it means to be Canadian. We are subordinating Canadian to the second part of a hyphenated association with a sub-culture within Canada. We dance around issues for fear of hurting someone's feelings rather than confronting issues and hammering them out to the greater interest of us all. Our government is leading that plunge.
We have failed to create any vision for Canada's future. Consequently our nation is aimlessly moving towards chaos at the federal, provincial and local levels.
At the moment there is a parliamentary act, Bill C-51 that proposes draconian controls and moves Canada another step closer to fascism. It attempts to put the natural products, vitamin, supplement, homeopathic industry at a disadvantage. It discourages Canadians from choosing and choosing health. It encourages us to follow the whims of the pharmaceutical industry and the medical profession. I realize that many believe they are doing good in both medical and pharma industries, but are they?
We have a "sick care" system, not a "health care" system regardless of what it is labelled officially. Doctors treat the sick. Hospitals are for the sick. Pharmaceuticals are to treat the sick and diseased. None of this promotes sustaining of a healthy state so that we don't get sick. There is no education in Canada beyond the most basic levels in grade school that is aimed at teaching us about maintaining our personal health. Essentially we are left with the knowledge that if we get sick we get taken care of. That's fine and we do enjoy that, but why not encourage us to avoid sickness?
Bill C-51 supports the pharmaceutical industry interests. I'm sure it's being paid for behind the scenes with payoffs to our Prime Minister (Stephen Harper) and Minister of Health (Tony Clement). Sure, those will be hidden in contributions or some in-kind donation to something or other. You won't see the money in their bank accounts. But it's no less real. C-51 puts roadblocks in the path of those of us who choose health, who choose to educate ourselves (because we care) and who choose to stay out of our expensive and overburdened "sick care" system. It's absurdity and it is driving Canada down yet another path to mediocrity.
If you are a Canadian reading this I urge you to write to your MP, to our Min of Health (Tony Clement) and our PM (Stephen Harper) to urge them to withdraw C-51 or at least to vote against it. Their address is: name, House of Commons, Ottawa, ON, K1A 0A6. No postage is required for letters to parliament so save your stamps. If you want to learn more please click on the link I've provided.
Choose free choice. Choose health. Choose a healthy and vigorous Canada free from the political interference of our industrial lobby groups. Choose parliamentarians who truly represent all of our best interests in common not the interests of small special interest groups to the exclusion of others.
13 March 2008
Why do we have enemies?
I was wondering why some countries have many enemies and some don't. Why do some people have many enemies and others don't? Why do wars or other harmful conflicts erupt with some more often that with others?
In every conflict there are antagonists. They fight with each other in some way, each trying to harm the other more than the harm inflicted upon themselves. The one left standing (surviving or least harmed) when it's over is the winner. By definition the other loses. But why did those two (or more) choose the conflict and not some other pair or group? What do they have in common?
The most obvious trait is that they generally don't like each other. Wars have been started over territory (land and sea), over resources, over ethnic differences, over religion, etc. Yet people with disputes don't always end up in warfare or even as enemies. Some people with differences are able to resolve those differences and come to solutions that are beneficial to both. In business we call it "win-win". Everyone gets what they want.
Win-win strategies only work however if both parties are open to it. If one person doesn't want to play by those simple rules then it won't work. The other often walks away from the deal realizing that they won't be treated fairly by the other party. They don't want to abuse themselves so they won't expose themselves to it from others.
In conflicts this doesn't happen. One or both parties want something and the other is unwilling to allow it. Canada has few enemies - not because we are a weak country, although compared with our neighbor the USA, we are. We simply allow others what they want within reason. Where we have enemies, for example, the Taliban in Afghanistan, it's because we've been unwilling to allow them what they want. The Taliban has enemies because it can't allow others their practices. They have little to no tolerance for anything but their own extreme interpretation of Islam. And they have many enemies because many of us don't follow their ideas. Canada and the Taliban are enemies because of mutual non-allowance.
The USA has more of this happening. They won't allow Iraq to choose it's own destiny - the US wants to impose democracy and some in Iraq don't want it. Furthermore, the US is doing it by occupying their territory. In the 1700's when Britain occupied much of North America and Americans wanted a different form of government they did what Iraqi's are doing today - revolted and fought back. The revolutionaries won and now their decendants are imposing their will on others - exactly what their forefathers fought against. Yes, there is a stack of justification, some not so valid (after all President Bush did fabricate some of it), but does that make it right? Many are losing their freedom and even their lives because the US would like to impose its will. And some of us are following the lead, no doubt out of fear of some sort of reprisal from the US. They have indeed demonstrated their ability and willingness to impose their will for their own selfish desires - why not take over Canada. The fact that they'd end up with 10 more Democratic states having some 10 or 12% of the total vote might be holding the Republicans back - another fear.
At the root of every conflict is fear. The real enemy is our own fear about what might or might not happen in the future if we don't get our way. So we try to control it and thus eliminate options. Interference in what others are doing is what causes conflicts. Sometimes it seems morally justified and sometimes it's not. Regardless, it arises out of fear and our desire to control the outcome. Our apparent enemies are those we fear - those we act against, to harm or destroy or control. Our real enemy is the fear of the unknown that we have inside if we don't exercise that control.
Look at what can happen if you control too much. We use anti-biotics to "control" some illnesses. By using them however we have developed resistance to their effect. New, more resistant strains of those illnesses have arisen as a result. We've made the enemy stronger. Had we left it alone some would succumb, but more of us would simply develop our own ability to resist without help from artificial substances. Those substances can cause other problems in completely unrelated areas. Why abuse ourselves this way?
The simple answer is that we want to be abused. We certainly choose it as a society. And society is us. Stop the abuse. Don't just tolerate, allow. By allowing all, we allow both the "good" and the "bad". We benefit too. Perhaps by our example we'll see that those who would do harm may see the benefit of doing no harm and simply allowing as well. Notice how people around you will change when you change. You do create your own environment. That which you are is that which I am, and that which I am is that which you are.
In every conflict there are antagonists. They fight with each other in some way, each trying to harm the other more than the harm inflicted upon themselves. The one left standing (surviving or least harmed) when it's over is the winner. By definition the other loses. But why did those two (or more) choose the conflict and not some other pair or group? What do they have in common?
The most obvious trait is that they generally don't like each other. Wars have been started over territory (land and sea), over resources, over ethnic differences, over religion, etc. Yet people with disputes don't always end up in warfare or even as enemies. Some people with differences are able to resolve those differences and come to solutions that are beneficial to both. In business we call it "win-win". Everyone gets what they want.
Win-win strategies only work however if both parties are open to it. If one person doesn't want to play by those simple rules then it won't work. The other often walks away from the deal realizing that they won't be treated fairly by the other party. They don't want to abuse themselves so they won't expose themselves to it from others.
In conflicts this doesn't happen. One or both parties want something and the other is unwilling to allow it. Canada has few enemies - not because we are a weak country, although compared with our neighbor the USA, we are. We simply allow others what they want within reason. Where we have enemies, for example, the Taliban in Afghanistan, it's because we've been unwilling to allow them what they want. The Taliban has enemies because it can't allow others their practices. They have little to no tolerance for anything but their own extreme interpretation of Islam. And they have many enemies because many of us don't follow their ideas. Canada and the Taliban are enemies because of mutual non-allowance.
The USA has more of this happening. They won't allow Iraq to choose it's own destiny - the US wants to impose democracy and some in Iraq don't want it. Furthermore, the US is doing it by occupying their territory. In the 1700's when Britain occupied much of North America and Americans wanted a different form of government they did what Iraqi's are doing today - revolted and fought back. The revolutionaries won and now their decendants are imposing their will on others - exactly what their forefathers fought against. Yes, there is a stack of justification, some not so valid (after all President Bush did fabricate some of it), but does that make it right? Many are losing their freedom and even their lives because the US would like to impose its will. And some of us are following the lead, no doubt out of fear of some sort of reprisal from the US. They have indeed demonstrated their ability and willingness to impose their will for their own selfish desires - why not take over Canada. The fact that they'd end up with 10 more Democratic states having some 10 or 12% of the total vote might be holding the Republicans back - another fear.
At the root of every conflict is fear. The real enemy is our own fear about what might or might not happen in the future if we don't get our way. So we try to control it and thus eliminate options. Interference in what others are doing is what causes conflicts. Sometimes it seems morally justified and sometimes it's not. Regardless, it arises out of fear and our desire to control the outcome. Our apparent enemies are those we fear - those we act against, to harm or destroy or control. Our real enemy is the fear of the unknown that we have inside if we don't exercise that control.
Look at what can happen if you control too much. We use anti-biotics to "control" some illnesses. By using them however we have developed resistance to their effect. New, more resistant strains of those illnesses have arisen as a result. We've made the enemy stronger. Had we left it alone some would succumb, but more of us would simply develop our own ability to resist without help from artificial substances. Those substances can cause other problems in completely unrelated areas. Why abuse ourselves this way?
The simple answer is that we want to be abused. We certainly choose it as a society. And society is us. Stop the abuse. Don't just tolerate, allow. By allowing all, we allow both the "good" and the "bad". We benefit too. Perhaps by our example we'll see that those who would do harm may see the benefit of doing no harm and simply allowing as well. Notice how people around you will change when you change. You do create your own environment. That which you are is that which I am, and that which I am is that which you are.
Lies or liars - who's the enemy here?
I'm watching the US fascination with NY governor Spitzer's indiscretion. He was hiding what he was doing (albeit not very well) and got caught. He was lying to his family and the public with his false law and order face. I wonder how many other politicians are like that? Perhaps they don't all have affairs, but what else do they lie about. Hiding the truth is really no different than lying about it.
In Canada we've got probes into wrong doing by various government ministers and departments and they are being held up by political stalling over "access to information". In my time in the military I discovered that the real reason for most official secrets is their potential to embarass the country, not to do any harm. So why so many secrets? Clearly we have a lot to be embarassed about. And who's keeping the secrets a secret? Mostly politicians and politically minded civil servants when it comes to government. But curing government of all its stupidity seems pretty futile, although a worth goal.
What about individuals? Do they have secrets? Yes. Why? Same reason - the truth could be embarassing. Why? There is a fear that the truth could do harm. The harm has not been done yet, there is just fear of some future event that may or may not happen. So we put a lot of energy into avoiding what may not even happen only to create circumstances that lead others down dead end paths. If you've ever acted on a hot stock tip, or advice from someone biased you'll know what I mean.
Who's the enemy here? The liar? Yes, but there's more. The liar is lying because we allow it and even reward it. Not getting caught means that you've "won". In politics it appears that the better the liar the more we reward it. Just look at our current crop of politcal leaders - liars to the core. None of them carries out his or her promises. They keep information from us - ostensibly for the public good.
Of course the Liar isn't the only enemy here. We allow them! We are our own enemies here. Collectively we allow and reward it. We lie to ourselves. By allowing others and rewarding them for it, we encourage it. We clearly don't want the truth. Why? Because it might be painful. Perhaps it is, but it is the truth - nothing, no amount of lying will change that. Knowing the truth is empowering - once known, it can be dealt with.
Stop lying to others and yourself. Always provide the truth and expect it in return. Reward those who are honest, not those who lie.
Where can lying get you? Well look at the democratic presidential candidate race in the US. Someone has lied about whether or not the two candidates will really want to open up the NAFTA treaty for change. Perhaps Hilary Clinton lied, perhaps Barrack Obama lied, perhaps the news reporters lied, perhaps the Canadian politicians who "leaked" the news lied. We'll probably never know for sure who did, but we do know a lie was used. And the US will select the person most likely to be their next president in part because of the fallout of a lie. And they worry about "hanging chads" in Floida. What a joke!
Look around you. See the lies and the deception and the untold truth but more importantly, see what it creates. We create our own reality. After all, "Existence is but an Extension of Yourself" (source: The Wonders).
In Canada we've got probes into wrong doing by various government ministers and departments and they are being held up by political stalling over "access to information". In my time in the military I discovered that the real reason for most official secrets is their potential to embarass the country, not to do any harm. So why so many secrets? Clearly we have a lot to be embarassed about. And who's keeping the secrets a secret? Mostly politicians and politically minded civil servants when it comes to government. But curing government of all its stupidity seems pretty futile, although a worth goal.
What about individuals? Do they have secrets? Yes. Why? Same reason - the truth could be embarassing. Why? There is a fear that the truth could do harm. The harm has not been done yet, there is just fear of some future event that may or may not happen. So we put a lot of energy into avoiding what may not even happen only to create circumstances that lead others down dead end paths. If you've ever acted on a hot stock tip, or advice from someone biased you'll know what I mean.
Who's the enemy here? The liar? Yes, but there's more. The liar is lying because we allow it and even reward it. Not getting caught means that you've "won". In politics it appears that the better the liar the more we reward it. Just look at our current crop of politcal leaders - liars to the core. None of them carries out his or her promises. They keep information from us - ostensibly for the public good.
Of course the Liar isn't the only enemy here. We allow them! We are our own enemies here. Collectively we allow and reward it. We lie to ourselves. By allowing others and rewarding them for it, we encourage it. We clearly don't want the truth. Why? Because it might be painful. Perhaps it is, but it is the truth - nothing, no amount of lying will change that. Knowing the truth is empowering - once known, it can be dealt with.
Stop lying to others and yourself. Always provide the truth and expect it in return. Reward those who are honest, not those who lie.
Where can lying get you? Well look at the democratic presidential candidate race in the US. Someone has lied about whether or not the two candidates will really want to open up the NAFTA treaty for change. Perhaps Hilary Clinton lied, perhaps Barrack Obama lied, perhaps the news reporters lied, perhaps the Canadian politicians who "leaked" the news lied. We'll probably never know for sure who did, but we do know a lie was used. And the US will select the person most likely to be their next president in part because of the fallout of a lie. And they worry about "hanging chads" in Floida. What a joke!
Look around you. See the lies and the deception and the untold truth but more importantly, see what it creates. We create our own reality. After all, "Existence is but an Extension of Yourself" (source: The Wonders).
05 March 2008
Who's your biggest enemy?
I did the following speech at my last Toastmasters meeting in Barrie, Ontario, Thurs 28 Feb 08.
Who’s your biggest enemy?
In the Senior Dictionary of Canadian English an enemy is, “a person or group that hates and tries to harm another, a hostile force, anything harmful – e.g.: frost is an enemy of plants.”
Have you ever thought about who your biggest enemy really is?
We’ll look at two situations:
1. You are stuck in traffic and late for a meeting.
2. A close friend lies to you.
You are in traffic headed to an important meeting. You’ve been running behind all day and now you’re stuck with nothing to think about but being late. Your blood boils and you think about the bad things that could happen because you are missing. You’re stressed.
Adrenaline, our natural stress response chemical is released. It triggers increased cardio-vascular activity and oxygenation, your senses are heightened and pain isn’t felt. Overstimulation by adrenaline – which can occur gradually over time, can lead to high blood pressure, heart disease and more.
· You knew you were running late.
· You could have warned those you are visiting.
· You could have re-scheduled.
· You could have allowed more time in your schedule.
But no, you pushed against time. A battle you know you can’t win.
Studies of the chronically late show that many simply don’t value time – yours or theirs. They fail to appreciate the value placed on it by others. They are inherently selfish – they don’t care about your time and they place little value on you. In July 2005, Don Malachowski wrote about time wasters in the SF Chronicle. Being late is one of the top 10 time wasters in business. It’s responsible for 1% of time wasted. Salary.com calculated that in the US some $759 billion per year is spent by employers on time wasted. That’s $7.6 billion US per year for being late, or about $100 for every person in the workforce.
· Who controlled the situations leading up to being late?
· Who could have done something about it?
· Who could have made it on time for you?
· Who is stressed?
· Who suffers the result of adrenaline stimulation?
· Who’s your enemy?
Now, let’s say that your best friend told you her husband cheated on her. She’s baring her soul to you. You offer your support, you listen, she has a shoulder to cry on. You take on her pain, hoping it will lessen her misery.
But later, you learn that she didn’t tell you everything: she had also cheated on her husband!
She didn’t tell you the whole truth. Now you feel cheated – betrayed on some level. You still feel her pain so you don’t want to add to her misery. You bury your feelings. You keep it inside and you feel badly. Your adrenaline has reacted again. And again that natural stress response does a little bit of harm to you. But you could have seen it coming.
Right or wrong, cheating is not uncommon. Statistics vary widely but here are few samples:
· U of Chicago: 12 % of women cheat, 22 % of men cheat,
· Dr. Scott Haltzman, a psychiatrist: 20 % of women, 40 % of men,
· AskBob.com: 22 % of women, 37 % of men,
· The James Report on Sexual Behavior: 25 % of women, 35 % of men.
There’s a 50 / 50 chance that if the husband cheated, then so did the wife.
In this room of ______ women and ______ men it wouldn’t surprise me if ______ of the women and _____ of the men have or will cheat on their spouses.
Surprised? Perhaps, you’d be surprised if you hadn’t bothered to pay attention to what is pretty widely known and discussed. And you don’t need statistics to see it. John Legge, an old high school friend of mine and now a successful family lawyer in Toronto, jokingly attributes the success of his law practice to raging hormones.
Ever notice that when someone lies to you or doesn’t quite tell you everything, that you too were hiding something? Perhaps you were even hiding something from yourself. Not knowing, being uninformed, is a common way of deceiving ourselves.
We do it to avoid hurt. We all know that “ignorance is bliss”.
Now think about your reaction to the friend who cheated:
· Who didn’t see the facts?
· Who denied that she too might be cheating?
· Who fooled who?
· Who got stressed?
· Who was your enemy?
OUCH! In both these cases, the one hurting you is really you!
Dig into any situation and see the role you played in creating it. You even created tonight simply by being here. You are co-creator of the circumstances that you find yourself in.
The Wonders, a channeled entity say: “Existence is but an extension of yourself.”
It’s a statement that defines a harsh reality. Appreciate it and you realize that you can also change your circumstances by changing your choices.
If you don’t like where you are, then change your choices. Doing the same thing over and over doesn’t change the results – that’s a definition of insanity. Do something different - choose differently.
Blame doesn’t change your choices. It creates stress and harm. No one changes because you blame them. They only change when they choose to. They create their own existence.
You choose. You create.
In blaming others your greatest enemy is really you. Know your enemy. Know yourself. Look inside.
In 1974 Al Pacino played Michael Corleone in “The Godfather, Part II.” One of his often quoted lines was: “keep your friends close, but your enemies closer”.
Who’s your biggest enemy? Look inside. Know yourself and your biggest enemy becomes your biggest friend.
Who’s your biggest enemy?
In the Senior Dictionary of Canadian English an enemy is, “a person or group that hates and tries to harm another, a hostile force, anything harmful – e.g.: frost is an enemy of plants.”
Have you ever thought about who your biggest enemy really is?
We’ll look at two situations:
1. You are stuck in traffic and late for a meeting.
2. A close friend lies to you.
You are in traffic headed to an important meeting. You’ve been running behind all day and now you’re stuck with nothing to think about but being late. Your blood boils and you think about the bad things that could happen because you are missing. You’re stressed.
Adrenaline, our natural stress response chemical is released. It triggers increased cardio-vascular activity and oxygenation, your senses are heightened and pain isn’t felt. Overstimulation by adrenaline – which can occur gradually over time, can lead to high blood pressure, heart disease and more.
· You knew you were running late.
· You could have warned those you are visiting.
· You could have re-scheduled.
· You could have allowed more time in your schedule.
But no, you pushed against time. A battle you know you can’t win.
Studies of the chronically late show that many simply don’t value time – yours or theirs. They fail to appreciate the value placed on it by others. They are inherently selfish – they don’t care about your time and they place little value on you. In July 2005, Don Malachowski wrote about time wasters in the SF Chronicle. Being late is one of the top 10 time wasters in business. It’s responsible for 1% of time wasted. Salary.com calculated that in the US some $759 billion per year is spent by employers on time wasted. That’s $7.6 billion US per year for being late, or about $100 for every person in the workforce.
· Who controlled the situations leading up to being late?
· Who could have done something about it?
· Who could have made it on time for you?
· Who is stressed?
· Who suffers the result of adrenaline stimulation?
· Who’s your enemy?
Now, let’s say that your best friend told you her husband cheated on her. She’s baring her soul to you. You offer your support, you listen, she has a shoulder to cry on. You take on her pain, hoping it will lessen her misery.
But later, you learn that she didn’t tell you everything: she had also cheated on her husband!
She didn’t tell you the whole truth. Now you feel cheated – betrayed on some level. You still feel her pain so you don’t want to add to her misery. You bury your feelings. You keep it inside and you feel badly. Your adrenaline has reacted again. And again that natural stress response does a little bit of harm to you. But you could have seen it coming.
Right or wrong, cheating is not uncommon. Statistics vary widely but here are few samples:
· U of Chicago: 12 % of women cheat, 22 % of men cheat,
· Dr. Scott Haltzman, a psychiatrist: 20 % of women, 40 % of men,
· AskBob.com: 22 % of women, 37 % of men,
· The James Report on Sexual Behavior: 25 % of women, 35 % of men.
There’s a 50 / 50 chance that if the husband cheated, then so did the wife.
In this room of ______ women and ______ men it wouldn’t surprise me if ______ of the women and _____ of the men have or will cheat on their spouses.
Surprised? Perhaps, you’d be surprised if you hadn’t bothered to pay attention to what is pretty widely known and discussed. And you don’t need statistics to see it. John Legge, an old high school friend of mine and now a successful family lawyer in Toronto, jokingly attributes the success of his law practice to raging hormones.
Ever notice that when someone lies to you or doesn’t quite tell you everything, that you too were hiding something? Perhaps you were even hiding something from yourself. Not knowing, being uninformed, is a common way of deceiving ourselves.
We do it to avoid hurt. We all know that “ignorance is bliss”.
Now think about your reaction to the friend who cheated:
· Who didn’t see the facts?
· Who denied that she too might be cheating?
· Who fooled who?
· Who got stressed?
· Who was your enemy?
OUCH! In both these cases, the one hurting you is really you!
Dig into any situation and see the role you played in creating it. You even created tonight simply by being here. You are co-creator of the circumstances that you find yourself in.
The Wonders, a channeled entity say: “Existence is but an extension of yourself.”
It’s a statement that defines a harsh reality. Appreciate it and you realize that you can also change your circumstances by changing your choices.
If you don’t like where you are, then change your choices. Doing the same thing over and over doesn’t change the results – that’s a definition of insanity. Do something different - choose differently.
Blame doesn’t change your choices. It creates stress and harm. No one changes because you blame them. They only change when they choose to. They create their own existence.
You choose. You create.
In blaming others your greatest enemy is really you. Know your enemy. Know yourself. Look inside.
In 1974 Al Pacino played Michael Corleone in “The Godfather, Part II.” One of his often quoted lines was: “keep your friends close, but your enemies closer”.
Who’s your biggest enemy? Look inside. Know yourself and your biggest enemy becomes your biggest friend.
02 March 2008
Enemies reduce you!
By definition, your enemies want to harm you. "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer" is wise advice. But what does it mean?
Get to know who your enemies really are and know them well - better than your friends.
Your friends are safe for you - they won't harm you. You relax with them, you can let down your guard. But your enemies are different.
Fear of what might happen, real or imagined, causes you to stop. Usually it's because the future, what follows if you ignore the fear is unknown. It MIGHT BE harmful. So we stop. But, getting past that fear and allowing yourself to live with the discomfort of the unknown, can be very expansive.
Ever notice how some people just go for as if fear didn't exist for them. Well - it does, they have simply learned how to use it. When I quit my job to form my company there were no guarantees - no clients were under contract, I was giving up a high paying job with a stable and secure company, I had no idea what would happen next. Yet I believed that I'd do well. I just knew it. And over time I've been proving that it was a wise move. How did I get to that knowing?
I certainly thought about my options logically. Give up a high paying job, lose the security of that job, put my livlihood and my home (which wasn't paid for) at risk. Yet I hated the way I had to work in the company I was in. I was stressed and that was harming me. I knew it was eating at me, that was harmful to me but I didn't realize just how harmful. I was scared. If I started to miss payments I'd be in deep trouble with the banks. From a purely logical perspective - I was better to stay put.
I chose to leave. I didn't quite the next day - I allowed myself time to get ready for it. I allowed myself time to legally register a company, get stationary printed and to get used to the whole concept. I allowed myself to get used to the uncertainty that lay ahead. It was uncomfortable for me and there were no sure things - the future was full of "what if's". But as I got used to that uncertainty, it became less threatening. I knew that I wouldn't knowingly harm myself. I knew I was capable of running the business. When I did finally quit my job I'd be able to focus exclusively on finding work because the details were looked after. As time went on the discomfort became more comfortable.
To this day, I really don't know what will happen next. I allow more abundance into my life. I have clients coming to me and I find new ones. But also lose some and I don't always win the bids when I compete for work. There are no guarantees. As a self employed individual I don't have a "safety net" of social services if I fail. Yet despite the uncertainties, the discomfort, I am comfortable because I KNOW that I'll be fine. I know I won't harm myself. I know I'm accepting abundance. I know I'm good at what I do and that it can help others and that they are willing to pay for that. I just KNOW I'll do well.
The fear of the uncertainty, the unknown that lay ahead when I was contemplating leaving my old job could have held me back. It could have been my enemy. But I chose to go in the direction of that fear. I chose the uncertainty, the discomfort and the risk. And it paid off. I continue to choose it - and it continues to pay off. I know that fear is a sign-post showing me where to go.
And yes, it still makes me uncomfortable. I still squirm at some of the possibilities. I still let it get the better of me sometimes. But overall, it is a sign-post pointing the way. The real enemy wasn't my fear. The real enemy is giving that fear my power. Giving in to it.
Choosing to go where the fear is screaming, "don't go there", is a sure fired way to do something new and different. That new direction is expansive - I learn with every choice, even if they don't work out the way I expect. Those lessons are valuable - I wouldn't have them if I didn't take the chance by choosing. Choice - the choice to do something new, something risky, something that creates uncertainty and discomfort is expansive.
Get to know who your enemies really are and know them well - better than your friends.
Your friends are safe for you - they won't harm you. You relax with them, you can let down your guard. But your enemies are different.
Fear of what might happen, real or imagined, causes you to stop. Usually it's because the future, what follows if you ignore the fear is unknown. It MIGHT BE harmful. So we stop. But, getting past that fear and allowing yourself to live with the discomfort of the unknown, can be very expansive.
Ever notice how some people just go for as if fear didn't exist for them. Well - it does, they have simply learned how to use it. When I quit my job to form my company there were no guarantees - no clients were under contract, I was giving up a high paying job with a stable and secure company, I had no idea what would happen next. Yet I believed that I'd do well. I just knew it. And over time I've been proving that it was a wise move. How did I get to that knowing?
I certainly thought about my options logically. Give up a high paying job, lose the security of that job, put my livlihood and my home (which wasn't paid for) at risk. Yet I hated the way I had to work in the company I was in. I was stressed and that was harming me. I knew it was eating at me, that was harmful to me but I didn't realize just how harmful. I was scared. If I started to miss payments I'd be in deep trouble with the banks. From a purely logical perspective - I was better to stay put.
I chose to leave. I didn't quite the next day - I allowed myself time to get ready for it. I allowed myself time to legally register a company, get stationary printed and to get used to the whole concept. I allowed myself to get used to the uncertainty that lay ahead. It was uncomfortable for me and there were no sure things - the future was full of "what if's". But as I got used to that uncertainty, it became less threatening. I knew that I wouldn't knowingly harm myself. I knew I was capable of running the business. When I did finally quit my job I'd be able to focus exclusively on finding work because the details were looked after. As time went on the discomfort became more comfortable.
To this day, I really don't know what will happen next. I allow more abundance into my life. I have clients coming to me and I find new ones. But also lose some and I don't always win the bids when I compete for work. There are no guarantees. As a self employed individual I don't have a "safety net" of social services if I fail. Yet despite the uncertainties, the discomfort, I am comfortable because I KNOW that I'll be fine. I know I won't harm myself. I know I'm accepting abundance. I know I'm good at what I do and that it can help others and that they are willing to pay for that. I just KNOW I'll do well.
The fear of the uncertainty, the unknown that lay ahead when I was contemplating leaving my old job could have held me back. It could have been my enemy. But I chose to go in the direction of that fear. I chose the uncertainty, the discomfort and the risk. And it paid off. I continue to choose it - and it continues to pay off. I know that fear is a sign-post showing me where to go.
And yes, it still makes me uncomfortable. I still squirm at some of the possibilities. I still let it get the better of me sometimes. But overall, it is a sign-post pointing the way. The real enemy wasn't my fear. The real enemy is giving that fear my power. Giving in to it.
Choosing to go where the fear is screaming, "don't go there", is a sure fired way to do something new and different. That new direction is expansive - I learn with every choice, even if they don't work out the way I expect. Those lessons are valuable - I wouldn't have them if I didn't take the chance by choosing. Choice - the choice to do something new, something risky, something that creates uncertainty and discomfort is expansive.
11 February 2008
Do you have responsibility but no authority?
This is a complaint I often hear from clients and others who are inspired to act on something new, but unable to do so because they don't have the authority to proceed. In my reliability consulting I often run into engineers and others who are responsible for results - improve plant reliability, but they have little to no spending authority. Sure they have some, but it's often well below the level they need to truly accomplish what they are there for. So where's the enemy in this scenario?
Yes, the boss has a higher level of spending (signing) authority, but often that's not high enough, the rules push us further up the corporate food chain. Look at government procurement as an extreme example. Government employees can spend money on goods and services up to preset and usually quite low spending limits. Beyond that they must go through a complex bidding process to get anything done. The process is intended to be fair, but often times it only "appears" fair. Bid processes are often "rigged" in very subtle ways to direct the result where the originator of the request wants it to go anyway. The real victim is the government's "customer" (that's us the tax payers) who have to wait longer and spend more to get something that was clearly needed all along. The rules have truly created harm in this case. So where's the enemy? It's not the rules!
The rules reflect people's fears. Those fears are based in a fear of someone else's reaction to your actions. Look again a government procurement rules. There are multiple levels of fear at play. The superficial fear is that a government employee will abuse his / her spending priviledges and "cheat" the taxpayers. Most people are truly honest - very few are cheaters or we'd have a lot more in jails. The rules don't really keep honest people honest - guidelines that make sense to the honest person (not overly constraining rules) would do that just as well. So that fear is not well founded. The next layer of fear is that the spending would go to "favourites" of the person doing the spending. And all government spending must provide equal opportunity to all who might want to bid.
But, if the person originating the request has done their homework - as they usually have, they already know who "should" win the bid and often create a statement of work or some other qualification requirement that will end up in the bidding documents that almost certainly ensures that person will win. This process creates a lot of work for the originator, those who manage the bidding process (remember they are at arms length from everyone) and the bidders (most of whom didn't stand a real chance in the first instance). This wastes a lot of peoples' time and money and drives up the cost of the job - just to fund the procurement process. Again, is this really what we the taxpayers want? It only truly serves a few special interest groups who want to bid but feel mistreated because they seldom win anyway. If they were truly aware of what's going on they'd shift their tactics and learn from their unsuccessful bids. Why should we taxpayers waste our money for that? Fear of appearing to be unfair to only a few poor (bid) losers is driving a whole lot of cost, inefficiency and holding people back. The government employee who had to start this process was originally responding to a legitimate need after all - and it must wait for all this to happen. We are not being well served by these rigid rules.
And that occurs in business too - it is by no means limited to government. Sometimes the goal is as simple as finding the lowest cost supplier. I've seen companies spend thousands of dollars on procurement processes that save them only hundreds. And then they wonder why they have a consultant (yes, someone like me) around to show them that!
There are many examples to share of rules being put aside, and admonishments for not putting them aside too.
1. I was an engineer with a petro-chemical company earlier in my career. I found a problem with some machinery that required an expensive part to be made and transported from Houston, TX to our plant (about 1,000 miles). The cost of all that was well above my spending authority, that of my boss and that of the purchaser. We needed the plant managers signature. Getting that caused a delay of several hours - each of those hours cost us over $100,000 in downtime (lost opportunity cost). When I finally got his signature he admonished me for waiting. Why didn't I just make up a PO #, go around the system, get what we needed and save us all that money? Lesson learned.
2. When the Royal Navy had to mobilize for war in the Falklands (1982) they had to mount a complex and large campaign a long way from home - something the RN hadn't done for over a century. They literally tossed the rule books aside to allow very junior officers and non-commissioned officers enough authority to get what they needed done in a timely manner - time was of the essence (as lawyers like to say).
In both of those cases the goals were clear and we (the people with responsibility but no authority) knew what had to be done. There was no good reason to hold us back. The goal - that objective that was very clear, was all that was needed. The rules didn't fit the circumstances. And they seldom do.
The enemy is the misbelief in some sort of reprisal from some third party (who probably doesn't even know what's going on). The rules are there to protect that uninformed person's interests and to prevent abuse by otherwise well-intentioned employees. Is that really smart? Recognize the enemy here - it's not the rules, it's not even the fear, it's what we are fearing. Look beneath the obvious to find your enemies and then ask if you really need to fear them.
Yes, the boss has a higher level of spending (signing) authority, but often that's not high enough, the rules push us further up the corporate food chain. Look at government procurement as an extreme example. Government employees can spend money on goods and services up to preset and usually quite low spending limits. Beyond that they must go through a complex bidding process to get anything done. The process is intended to be fair, but often times it only "appears" fair. Bid processes are often "rigged" in very subtle ways to direct the result where the originator of the request wants it to go anyway. The real victim is the government's "customer" (that's us the tax payers) who have to wait longer and spend more to get something that was clearly needed all along. The rules have truly created harm in this case. So where's the enemy? It's not the rules!
The rules reflect people's fears. Those fears are based in a fear of someone else's reaction to your actions. Look again a government procurement rules. There are multiple levels of fear at play. The superficial fear is that a government employee will abuse his / her spending priviledges and "cheat" the taxpayers. Most people are truly honest - very few are cheaters or we'd have a lot more in jails. The rules don't really keep honest people honest - guidelines that make sense to the honest person (not overly constraining rules) would do that just as well. So that fear is not well founded. The next layer of fear is that the spending would go to "favourites" of the person doing the spending. And all government spending must provide equal opportunity to all who might want to bid.
But, if the person originating the request has done their homework - as they usually have, they already know who "should" win the bid and often create a statement of work or some other qualification requirement that will end up in the bidding documents that almost certainly ensures that person will win. This process creates a lot of work for the originator, those who manage the bidding process (remember they are at arms length from everyone) and the bidders (most of whom didn't stand a real chance in the first instance). This wastes a lot of peoples' time and money and drives up the cost of the job - just to fund the procurement process. Again, is this really what we the taxpayers want? It only truly serves a few special interest groups who want to bid but feel mistreated because they seldom win anyway. If they were truly aware of what's going on they'd shift their tactics and learn from their unsuccessful bids. Why should we taxpayers waste our money for that? Fear of appearing to be unfair to only a few poor (bid) losers is driving a whole lot of cost, inefficiency and holding people back. The government employee who had to start this process was originally responding to a legitimate need after all - and it must wait for all this to happen. We are not being well served by these rigid rules.
And that occurs in business too - it is by no means limited to government. Sometimes the goal is as simple as finding the lowest cost supplier. I've seen companies spend thousands of dollars on procurement processes that save them only hundreds. And then they wonder why they have a consultant (yes, someone like me) around to show them that!
There are many examples to share of rules being put aside, and admonishments for not putting them aside too.
1. I was an engineer with a petro-chemical company earlier in my career. I found a problem with some machinery that required an expensive part to be made and transported from Houston, TX to our plant (about 1,000 miles). The cost of all that was well above my spending authority, that of my boss and that of the purchaser. We needed the plant managers signature. Getting that caused a delay of several hours - each of those hours cost us over $100,000 in downtime (lost opportunity cost). When I finally got his signature he admonished me for waiting. Why didn't I just make up a PO #, go around the system, get what we needed and save us all that money? Lesson learned.
2. When the Royal Navy had to mobilize for war in the Falklands (1982) they had to mount a complex and large campaign a long way from home - something the RN hadn't done for over a century. They literally tossed the rule books aside to allow very junior officers and non-commissioned officers enough authority to get what they needed done in a timely manner - time was of the essence (as lawyers like to say).
In both of those cases the goals were clear and we (the people with responsibility but no authority) knew what had to be done. There was no good reason to hold us back. The goal - that objective that was very clear, was all that was needed. The rules didn't fit the circumstances. And they seldom do.
The enemy is the misbelief in some sort of reprisal from some third party (who probably doesn't even know what's going on). The rules are there to protect that uninformed person's interests and to prevent abuse by otherwise well-intentioned employees. Is that really smart? Recognize the enemy here - it's not the rules, it's not even the fear, it's what we are fearing. Look beneath the obvious to find your enemies and then ask if you really need to fear them.
10 February 2008
Are you surrounded by enemies?
Do you ever feel like you've got nothing but enemies around you? Like you can trust no one? Do you treat others with suspicion? Do you always count your change and then attack the other person if they've made an error? Do you feel like they are trying to cheat you?
These feelings, and many others, are signs that you are creating a combative, enemy-rich environment around you. We all create our own environments, our surroundings, the context within which we operate.
Have you ever wondered if anyone tryied to cheat Mother Theresa or anyone else who is very giving of themselves? It's tough to imagine isn't it. Why? Someone who is always helping others, giving of themselves is not someone who you have to cheat. They have created an environment around themselves where no one would want to cheat them.
Have you ever had a boss at work who was truly supportive and nurturing? Someone who really wanted you to succeed? Notice how that person is held in high regard - not just by you, but by many others. I have had many bosses like that - they truly wanted me to succeed and helped me to do so. When one of them, John, died a few years ago I cried - as did many of my colleauges who also worked closely with him. We all felt as if we had lost a kind and loving influence in our lives - and we had. John had very few if any enemies. Even his competitors felt a loss. He had created that environment by simply being himself. He wasn't distrustful. He didn't create enemies.
There are many stories of how people create their own enemies and others create allies. Dale Carnegie's books have many such examples. Treat people harshly and you'll find it comes back to you. Treat them with respect, truly appreciate them, and you'll be respected and appreciated. Others want to do things for those who make them feel good about themselves. If you distrust someone or create that enemy relationship in some other way, you'll create that environment and be treated accordingly.
I used to have some distrust of a fellow named Rene. He was a "consultant" of sorts to me - a coach / mentor / teacher. When he'd suggest that I needed a bit more help I'd feel that he really wanted more billable hours - at my expense. I was learning a lot so I put up with it. I'd complain about it to myself, but I also looked inside myself. Would I do that to a client? No, I wouldn't - I never have, but I would think about it. Other fears would always hold me back. So why would I fear this from Rene? I realized that since I wouldn't do it, then neither would he, but a part of me thought about doing it and had to be explored. He would trigger all sorts of feelings about myself by allowing me to feel something bad about him. It was part of the way he taught me. I only had to feel it, go inside and challenge my feelings about myself - dig into why I felt that way and then make a choice. When I realized that, I began to trust him much more fully. I realized he was truly helping me and that I was indeed getting good value for the money I was paying to him. I have learned, and continue to learn a lot about myself by observing these feelings.
When I argue with my wife Aileen, I ask myself why? What is being triggered? What feelings do I have about her that are reflecting something inside me? In the moment I don't always see this - so we argue. Later I reflect on it and dig deeply into myself. I have always discovered something about me that needed to be uncovered. Once that's revealed to me, out in the open, I can deal with it and make a choice. Do I want to continue that way, or change? Usually I choose change.
Look into your feelings about those around you and then turn them around on yourself. By observing your feelings about others you are revealing your feelings about aspects of yourself. Ask yourself, what is it about me that I don't trust? that I don't respect? that I don't appreciate? that I don't love? Dig and you'll find answers. By doing this you get to know yourself better. By doing that, you can choose to either stay the same or to change how you feel about yourself. Reframe those feelings about yourself. You'll find that it is reflected in how you deal with others. And you'll make fewer enemies. By changing, the enemies you already have will even see a new you. They'll wonder what happened to you. And they'll become friends - people who want to help you.
These feelings, and many others, are signs that you are creating a combative, enemy-rich environment around you. We all create our own environments, our surroundings, the context within which we operate.
Have you ever wondered if anyone tryied to cheat Mother Theresa or anyone else who is very giving of themselves? It's tough to imagine isn't it. Why? Someone who is always helping others, giving of themselves is not someone who you have to cheat. They have created an environment around themselves where no one would want to cheat them.
Have you ever had a boss at work who was truly supportive and nurturing? Someone who really wanted you to succeed? Notice how that person is held in high regard - not just by you, but by many others. I have had many bosses like that - they truly wanted me to succeed and helped me to do so. When one of them, John, died a few years ago I cried - as did many of my colleauges who also worked closely with him. We all felt as if we had lost a kind and loving influence in our lives - and we had. John had very few if any enemies. Even his competitors felt a loss. He had created that environment by simply being himself. He wasn't distrustful. He didn't create enemies.
There are many stories of how people create their own enemies and others create allies. Dale Carnegie's books have many such examples. Treat people harshly and you'll find it comes back to you. Treat them with respect, truly appreciate them, and you'll be respected and appreciated. Others want to do things for those who make them feel good about themselves. If you distrust someone or create that enemy relationship in some other way, you'll create that environment and be treated accordingly.
I used to have some distrust of a fellow named Rene. He was a "consultant" of sorts to me - a coach / mentor / teacher. When he'd suggest that I needed a bit more help I'd feel that he really wanted more billable hours - at my expense. I was learning a lot so I put up with it. I'd complain about it to myself, but I also looked inside myself. Would I do that to a client? No, I wouldn't - I never have, but I would think about it. Other fears would always hold me back. So why would I fear this from Rene? I realized that since I wouldn't do it, then neither would he, but a part of me thought about doing it and had to be explored. He would trigger all sorts of feelings about myself by allowing me to feel something bad about him. It was part of the way he taught me. I only had to feel it, go inside and challenge my feelings about myself - dig into why I felt that way and then make a choice. When I realized that, I began to trust him much more fully. I realized he was truly helping me and that I was indeed getting good value for the money I was paying to him. I have learned, and continue to learn a lot about myself by observing these feelings.
When I argue with my wife Aileen, I ask myself why? What is being triggered? What feelings do I have about her that are reflecting something inside me? In the moment I don't always see this - so we argue. Later I reflect on it and dig deeply into myself. I have always discovered something about me that needed to be uncovered. Once that's revealed to me, out in the open, I can deal with it and make a choice. Do I want to continue that way, or change? Usually I choose change.
Look into your feelings about those around you and then turn them around on yourself. By observing your feelings about others you are revealing your feelings about aspects of yourself. Ask yourself, what is it about me that I don't trust? that I don't respect? that I don't appreciate? that I don't love? Dig and you'll find answers. By doing this you get to know yourself better. By doing that, you can choose to either stay the same or to change how you feel about yourself. Reframe those feelings about yourself. You'll find that it is reflected in how you deal with others. And you'll make fewer enemies. By changing, the enemies you already have will even see a new you. They'll wonder what happened to you. And they'll become friends - people who want to help you.
Do we have enemies in our family?
Those of us old enough to remember "Leave it to Beaver" and the "Dick van Dyke Show" among others will recall how families used to be portrayed as being loving with very supportive environments. A newer show, "Seventh Heaven" does much the same thing, but it also shows how we get into trouble by not fully appreciating the help we can get from our families.
By not appreciating those closest to us we set them up, even in small ways, as enemies (at least in our own minds). We hide things from them. Why? Don't we trust them? Are we afraid that we'll somehow be judged and therefore "less than" if we open up? Complete openness and honesty are hallmarks of how we behave with our closest friends - our confidants. If you don't feel comfortable being that way with family, then you've created an enemy in your perceptions of those family members. Chances are that they will also feel the same about you. And neither of you will realize it fully. The more consciously aware you are of this, the more you can break down those barriers.
Open up and be honest. Let the other know how you feel and why you don't open up fully. Be the first to break down the barrier. You may be surprised at their response and how loving it can be. I did this just last night with my wife. I told her how I was feeling and what thoughts that was creating in my mind. By doing that, I allowed her into a part of me that I was shielding and keeping to myself. Her response? She opened right up to me in a way that she'd never done before. She shared similar thoughts that she was having. We were able to discuss it all openly and in a loving way - no fighting, no malice what-so-ever. It was amazingly loving and we both feel so much freer than we had. It helped us and it can help you too.
If you think of your family as someone to hide from, keep secrets from, then you'll be creating a sort of enemy. Someone you don't trust or can't be open with. You'll never be fully comfortable with them and if you can't be comfortable with them, how can you be comfortable with others?
Look inside. Examine what you want to hide and why. What are you afraid of if you let it out in a loving way? Chances are that whoever you hold back from, they are also holding back from you. Love is a two way street - putting up speed bumps and barriers blocks the flow. Take them down.
By not appreciating those closest to us we set them up, even in small ways, as enemies (at least in our own minds). We hide things from them. Why? Don't we trust them? Are we afraid that we'll somehow be judged and therefore "less than" if we open up? Complete openness and honesty are hallmarks of how we behave with our closest friends - our confidants. If you don't feel comfortable being that way with family, then you've created an enemy in your perceptions of those family members. Chances are that they will also feel the same about you. And neither of you will realize it fully. The more consciously aware you are of this, the more you can break down those barriers.
Open up and be honest. Let the other know how you feel and why you don't open up fully. Be the first to break down the barrier. You may be surprised at their response and how loving it can be. I did this just last night with my wife. I told her how I was feeling and what thoughts that was creating in my mind. By doing that, I allowed her into a part of me that I was shielding and keeping to myself. Her response? She opened right up to me in a way that she'd never done before. She shared similar thoughts that she was having. We were able to discuss it all openly and in a loving way - no fighting, no malice what-so-ever. It was amazingly loving and we both feel so much freer than we had. It helped us and it can help you too.
If you think of your family as someone to hide from, keep secrets from, then you'll be creating a sort of enemy. Someone you don't trust or can't be open with. You'll never be fully comfortable with them and if you can't be comfortable with them, how can you be comfortable with others?
Look inside. Examine what you want to hide and why. What are you afraid of if you let it out in a loving way? Chances are that whoever you hold back from, they are also holding back from you. Love is a two way street - putting up speed bumps and barriers blocks the flow. Take them down.
09 February 2008
Business without enemies
In business we are always worried about some "threat". It could be competitive or it could be predatory. It could be the taxman, the customer who could dump you and switch business elsewhere, the employee who sabotages your business and so on.
All of those worries stem from fears. We are afraid of something bad happening to our business because of the actions of others. We blame "them," whoever they are, for our mis-fortunes. Indeed, others do have a hand to play in our success or failure, but so do we. I'll talk about our role in a future blog entry. Here it's about others.
If we don't see others as enemies and they too share that view, then what's to fear? A competitor is looking after his / her own interest, not trying to harm yours. In fact a competitor helps you by keeping you on top of your game or you'll loose business. If that happens, it's not because of the competitor, it's because of your response (or lack of it) to a competitive challenge.
If your suppliers and customers don't see you as an enemy, then they'll see you as a "partner" or a "friend". Look at how the world's greatest manufacturer deals with suppliers and customers for an example. Toyota has been doing this for a long time. And they are doing very well. This approach to business works well for them - why can't it work for you too?
Look at other businesses where suppliers are treated as expendable and potentially threatening if their prices are too high. Do business as a supplier to most companies and you'll see what I mean. The customer or client wants you to lower prices, to speed up delivery, to invoice slowly, to forgive late payments... They are not respecting your legitimate business needs and they truly don't appreciate you. Some of these customers are even not worth having at all.
If you don't see your business interactions as threatening, then why would you be defensive? Give it a thought - if you shifted your perspective perhaps you can influence those you deal with too. It works for me. Being open about it is a first step.
All of those worries stem from fears. We are afraid of something bad happening to our business because of the actions of others. We blame "them," whoever they are, for our mis-fortunes. Indeed, others do have a hand to play in our success or failure, but so do we. I'll talk about our role in a future blog entry. Here it's about others.
If we don't see others as enemies and they too share that view, then what's to fear? A competitor is looking after his / her own interest, not trying to harm yours. In fact a competitor helps you by keeping you on top of your game or you'll loose business. If that happens, it's not because of the competitor, it's because of your response (or lack of it) to a competitive challenge.
If your suppliers and customers don't see you as an enemy, then they'll see you as a "partner" or a "friend". Look at how the world's greatest manufacturer deals with suppliers and customers for an example. Toyota has been doing this for a long time. And they are doing very well. This approach to business works well for them - why can't it work for you too?
Look at other businesses where suppliers are treated as expendable and potentially threatening if their prices are too high. Do business as a supplier to most companies and you'll see what I mean. The customer or client wants you to lower prices, to speed up delivery, to invoice slowly, to forgive late payments... They are not respecting your legitimate business needs and they truly don't appreciate you. Some of these customers are even not worth having at all.
If you don't see your business interactions as threatening, then why would you be defensive? Give it a thought - if you shifted your perspective perhaps you can influence those you deal with too. It works for me. Being open about it is a first step.
What is a "world without enemies"
Imagine a world where no one will intentionally do harm to you. This world would be free of many evils we know today.
We need to shift our consciousness to make this happen. Realize that whenever you hurm someone, harm another, do harm to property or the environment, we all suffer - including you. There are consequences for every action - including doing harm of any sort.
Hurt someone - they may hurt you back.
Harm the environment - you live with the pollution too.
Hurt yourself - you even hurt those close to you.
Some religions suggest we forgive. Turn the other cheek. Why not? If you don't hurt someone back, then the cycle of harm stops. When you are angry - tell the other person, but don't abuse them with angry words or actions. Let them know how you feel and then work with them to resolve it. And be willing to work with others to resolve problems that they bring to your attention.
Do this in your personal life. It can pay huge dividends. I already do it - sometimes it's challenging to break loose of my old ways. But it is worth the effort. Try it.
- There would be no need for war.
- There would be no need for "adversarial" processes such as those common in the legal systems of many countries.
- There would be no need to arm yourself as defense against predatory individuals or nations.
- There would be no need to fear competition - the competitors are not enemies, their presence helps you improve.
We need to shift our consciousness to make this happen. Realize that whenever you hurm someone, harm another, do harm to property or the environment, we all suffer - including you. There are consequences for every action - including doing harm of any sort.
Hurt someone - they may hurt you back.
Harm the environment - you live with the pollution too.
Hurt yourself - you even hurt those close to you.
Some religions suggest we forgive. Turn the other cheek. Why not? If you don't hurt someone back, then the cycle of harm stops. When you are angry - tell the other person, but don't abuse them with angry words or actions. Let them know how you feel and then work with them to resolve it. And be willing to work with others to resolve problems that they bring to your attention.
Do this in your personal life. It can pay huge dividends. I already do it - sometimes it's challenging to break loose of my old ways. But it is worth the effort. Try it.
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